THE SCALE

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My boyfriend took the scale. Anxiety has spiked.

He does it out of love, but I am still so angry with him. Because here’s the thing: I can’t DO ANYTHING ABOUT ANYTHING!!! I ate this weekend–a lot–and I feel huge and I can’t fit into my clothes any more so I wear sweats all the time. And my boyfriend is not attracted to me and now I can’t figure out at exactly what weight I become attractive again. So, I’m in this limbo land without a scale and no way to get another one.

I’m so tired of this fucking ankle and not being able to do anything. I’m so tired of hating myself and my body. It’s exhausting. I would like to feel attractive again. For just a little bit. I’d like to feel worth something.

This is a depressing post and I’m sorry. Next one will be more uplifting–I promise.

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About kickingitedstyle

I am a thirty-something ass kicker who also happens to have an ED. And two cats. And an awesome boyfriend, etc.

2 responses to “THE SCALE

  1. you are beautiful, a number on the scale will not change that.. i had this same issue i had to get over the scale decided if i was gonna be happy or sad that day and getting rid of it was the best thing for me..even when i got down to my what i thought would be “attractive” weight, i still didnt feel it bc it wasnt just my body i hated it was like everything, my mindset body food etc.. take it one day at a time..your bf took it because he cares about you, so you are obv worth something to someone! just pick yourself up and try again :-)!

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